to who needs to hear this
I don’t ascribe to your belief. Impactful relationships, do just that, they have an impact. If you haven’t changed in the duration of your relationship, you haven’t grown.
I find it beautiful that how you’ve changed in the duration of your relationship is a permanent marker on you of the person responsible for causing that change. That is the risk that you take when you create and build bonds that matter.
Personally, I have noticed that I remember good memories infinitely more than the struggles. However, it is important to note that this only stands true when I’ve had sufficient time to be able to detach myself from the emotions of the moment and assess logically. So, I associate relationships with growth and positive memories, regardless of how they end.
How a relationship ends, only encompasses a small portion of what matters. The way I see it, all bonds that you form, have to end. Some last your lifetime, some do not. That does not determine its quality.
So, stop beating yourself up about decisions you’ve made or situations that haunt you for who you were in the past. No matter what you do, change is inevitable. Therefore, with the right mindset, growth is inevitable too. You may face the same pain, you may battle the same ideas but you will learn and you will grow.
Your hostility to your past is misplaced. Your difficulty to accept how things turned out will only result in a lengthy battle to revert change and revert growth.
Theoretically, what you need to do is pack all of it in a figurative box and store it as a part of you. You acknowledge its existence and come back to it in a few years where fond memories are all you can perceive. Unfortunately, executing this to your life is a battle of your own.
Prithvi
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